Sarah Clark
National Geographic

Dear Ms Clark,

I've always suspected that National Geographic was a liberal publication. My suspicions were confirmed today when I saw your map of the Middle East. Venezuela is nowhere to be found. Obviously, you put up new maps to embarrass John McCain after he called out Venezuela as a Middle Eastern country.

I also noticed that your maps showing the shape and location of Pakistan, Alaska, Russia, and Spain do not match the descriptions given by Sen. McCain and Sarah Palin.

I'm enclosing new maps that conform to Palin-McCain specifications. Please use them.

Heterosexually yours in a chaste and biblically appropriate kind of way,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot