Contact: Media Relations
Chris Haire
Diversified Solutions Inc.
chris (at) freetheseed.com

HEY KIDS. HELP SAVE BIG TOBACCO

Big Tobacco is in trouble. Not only has the federal government placed unconstitutional restrictions on tobacco advertising, but recent court-ordered fines are robbing companies of their justly earned revenues. It gets worse – the federal government even has the gall to force Big Tobacco to fund public service announcements discouraging Americans from enjoying tobacco in all of its forms and flavors.

As a result of these efforts by Uncle Sam to cripple the tobacco industry, Big Tobacco may soon turn to a drastic series of employee layoffs to remain in business. If this happens, millions of mothers and fathers will find themselves penniless and on the streets. They won’t be alone. Their children will be right there with them.

That’s right, America. Once on the streets, millions of innocent American children - the sons and daughters of the employees of Big Tobacco - will find themselves without proper clothing, nutritional meals, adequate shelter, and health care coverage. They will be prey to pimps, drug dealers and child molesters. Their lives will be in danger, all because the federal government continues to wage a campaign of industrial genocide. Sadly enough, it looks as if Uncle Sam can’t be stopped.

There is a Solution. And it’s in the hands of the very people who are most in danger – the sons and daughters of Big Tobacco.

In order to save their parents’ jobs, it’s time for the children of the tobacco industry - and their school yard friends - to break the twin habits of apathy and abstinence and do something to save their fathers, their mothers and themselves. It’s time for them to take up smoking. It’s time for them to light up and lessen the load placed on Big Tobacco. With their help, the tobacco industry can still be saved.

But big government doesn’t want America’s youth to know about the benefits of cigarette smoking. They want to keep the truths hidden behind a veil of smoke. They want to mislead. They want to lie.

We here at Diversified Solutions Inc. believe that more can be done to inform America's youth about the benefits of cigarette smoking - as well as the impact that a smoking recession would have on the economy and, more importantly, their own lives. To spread the word to the young people of America, we are launching an nationwide ad campaign highlighting many of the positive aspects of cigarette smoking.

The series of 30-second television commercials and print and Internet advertisements will address the following benefits of smoking:

-- Cigarette smoking combats nervousness and hyperactivity. It calms the body and settles the mind. In fact, the effects that smoking has on the humans are nearly identical to the effects of Ritalin. With this in mind, cigarettes could be an inexpensive alternative to Ritalin and other drugs used to combat ADHD.

-- Cigarette smoking has been a valuable meditation tool, used by many of mankind’s leading thinkers, artists and writers – people like Freud, Picasso and Twain. Think about it: without tobacco, the world would have never been introduced to psychoanalysis, cubism and Huckleberry Finn.

-- Cigarette smoking is popular among many of America's finest entertainers, including Mel Gibson, Cameron Diaz, and Fred Durst of Limp Bizkit. In a culture where celebrity is prized above all else, shouldn’t America’s youth be given the chance to not only emulate but follow the careers of their heroes and role models? Who is Uncle Sam to deprive young people of their red-carpet dreams?

-- Cigarette smoking can provide children with more than just smooth flavor and good times – it can also provide them with T-shirts, ball caps and pool cues, the very materials they need in their daily lives. But in order to get these indispensable items, they have to smoke – and send a hefty collection of UPC symbols and novelty cash to their respective cigarette manufacturers. For children in low-income households, these gifts from tobacco companies could mean the difference between shivering in the cold or feeling warm in the wintertime.

-- Cigarette smoking is a leisure-time activity almost any child can pick up. It does not discriminate based on height, weight or athletic ability. In a nation where the youth are increasingly without hobbies beyond those that can be found on television or in front of the computer screen, cigarette smoking will no doubt get many children off their feet and outdoors where they belong. In fact, the appetite suppressant properties of cigarette smoking alone could stop the spread of childhood obesity. It’s time to fight fat by lighting up.

With all of these reasons in mind, isn't it time that you, the children of America, consider joining millions of others in doing your part to support Big Tobacco, your parents, your friends and, more importantly, yourself.

Sin.,
Marshall Field
President of Diversified Solutions

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