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Global Capitalism

Protestors offer cops donuts as peace offering!





Prepared for the worst. Expecting devastation, chaos and mass destruction, Chicago's finest turn out in the thousands while protesters barely reached 800.

Every white collar wall street vampire you would talk to would tell you that it's best that Chicago spend millions of dollars in overtime and new uniforms just to prevent what happened in Seattle in 2000 from happening here in Chi-town.


Demonstrators armed with dunkin donuts, cameras, videorecorders and picket signs took the streets of downtown Chicago in a protest of global capitalism.


Paranoid city officials, advertising in the Chicago Tribune a ZERO tolerance policy for protestors, armed the police with gas masks and rubber bullets.

Protestors claimed they were afraid to fart in fear it would cause cops to think a bomb was activated; giving police a reason to use their newly purchased armor.


Some say the new police armor, and appearance at yesterdays rally, was a warm up for when Chicago - or the entire United States of Amerika - is on marshall law.


Protestors visiting Chicago was astounded at the number of police officers not accepting donuts. One protestor was quoted saying, "We thought the best way to let them [police] know that we come in peace was by offering them a donut. We thought that cops loved donuts. Maybe it's just another lie told by the media!"

The protest ended peacefully with only two arrest. One animal rights activist was arrested for trying to communicate with a horse, after he was told not to by the cops.


-Les quatre des nous!
 
 

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